The Thailand Lady Boy Survival Guide – Never Be Tricked By a Ladyboy
I didn’t know. I met her in Bangkok at one of the night clubs on Khao Son Road. It was late, I was with my three friends, and it was our first trip to Thailand. The club was dark, she had an amazing body, and she wanted to go home with me.
I rented a different hotel room so I didn’t disturb my friends. She sat me down, took off my clothes, and started to give me a blow job. I felt her amazing fake tits. I worked my hand down, lower, and lower…
I froze. Time stood still. I repeated to myself over and over, “Please, this can’t be happening to me. This must be a bad dream…”
My beautiful Thai girl had a dick!
I pushed her off and got up to leave. He-she laughed and told me she’s going to stay in the room for the night. I looked at her in disbelief and said, “I don’t give a fuck.”
I slammed the door and wondered if this makes me gay or just stupid….
This is a story that was told to me from some English tourists who came to Thailand for the first time. In fact, this happened on their first night in Thailand.
This is not a unique story. Many men have been tricked, manipulated, and fooled by lady boys because they don’t know what signs to look for.
That time has come to an end. We have grown tired of hearing of tourists getting “screwed” by Thai lady boys. Because of this, we have created “The Lady Boy Survival Guide.”
What is “The Lady Boy Survival Guide?” It is a guide created by the Gods of Thailand to guarantee that the above situation will never happen to you. Follow it and protect yourself from the “he-shes” of Thailand.
The Lady Boy Survival Guide:
Step 1 – Where Are You
Want to learn the best way to avoid lady boys? Don’t go to any tourist traps. Lady boys make their money from tourists that don’t know they are lady boys or from tourists who like lady boys.
If you’re in Bangkok, you’ll find many more lady boys in clubs near Khao San Road than you will in clubs like RCA.
Lesson 1: Avoid high traffic tourist areas.
Step 2 – Is She Tall
Is the girl tall? If so, then more tests will be required. It is not an absolute fact, but it’s a good rule of thumb, Thai lady boys tend to be tall while Thai women tend to be short.
Lesson 2: Height is an indicator.
Step 3 – Fake Breasts
Does she have fake breasts? Beautiful tall women with fake breasts may be common where you’re from, but in Thailand it increases the chances that you’re really with a man.
Lesson 3: Fakes breast are great on women, not so great on men.
Step 4 – Look at Her Hands, Feet, and Adam’s Apple
Lady boys tend to have hands and feet as large as yours. Is this the case with the girl you are talking to now? If so, be afraid.
The Adams apple is a different story. If she has an Adams apple the size of your balls, run the other way. If she doesn’t have an Adam’s apple, that doesn’t mean anything. It’s very easy for lady boys to have a surgery that shaves the Adams apple down so it’s not noticeable.
The hard core lady boys that have their penises removed will also have their Adam’s apple shaved down.
Lesson 4: Large hands and an Adam’s apple are not good signs.
Step 5 – Your Surroundings
Did you meet her in the darkest part of the club? Is the music so loud that it’s hard to hear her voice clearly? Are you drunk? These types of surroundings are a lady boy’s dream.
Lesson 5: Lady boys hang out in the darkest and loudest parts of the club.
Step 6 – Ask
Ask if she is a lady boy. Most will tell the truth, but some will not.
Lesson 6: Ask and you shall receive…sometimes.
Step 7 – Ask Your Friends
Unless your friends are real assholes, they should give you honest feedback on what they think. If they are not completely sure she is a lady, move on.
Lesson 7: Good friends can save you from waking up next to a man.
Unbreakable Rule from the Gods of Thailand
If the above is too much to remember in your drunken state, follow this one simple rule when you go out to meet Thai women. This one rule has rarely failed:
The more you drink, the shorter she has to be.
Don’t even talk to a tall Thai woman if you’re drunk. The risk is too great.
The sad fact in Thailand is, sometimes lady boys look very beautiful. They can be tall, have great breasts, and an amazing ass. They are manufactured to have the perfect shape that men desire.
Extra Tip: For those of you that don’t mind sleeping with a woman who has had a kid, do the baby test. Look for stretch marks, saggy breasts, and a stomach that is not firm. If she had a child, she is obviously not a lady boy.
Follow our advice and never experience the dread of waking up next to a Thai lady boy…again 🙂
Posted on Gods of Thailand April 1, 2011 in Thailand
WHO ARE THE GODS OF THAILAND?
We are men who live and travel southeast Asia that share our experiences. You can find more at Gods of Thailand which is dedicated to teaching men how to have the best time in Asia without the bullshit. We also created the most extensive Thailand VIP Membership Program to do just this.
Ladyboy lied to me when I asked. The height rule really is what should have clued me in. Other than that I was totally convinced she was a woman. I had seen ladyboy massage in that area before and it had been clear to me what they were. He/she was very aggressive which should have been another clue. The voice also seemed convincing to me, seemed nothing like the other ones I passed at that massage. When he/she start sucking it then it tell me. Definitely soul destroying. I felt Disgusting, ashamed, especially considering how I felt before I knew. Probably less likely to be fooled at real massage shops. Let real women who are tall find someone else.
If you think it’s a ladyboy, it’s a ladyboy!
Certainly it’s not nice when you’re put in a situation like that. Anyway, I think that the best thing is to ask from the first if it’s a she or a he.
How do these ladyboys look very much like girl ? where do they do makeup ? How does their breast look real?
Best tipp is: avoid amusement centers, avoid going out of strees, go to 5 Stars hotels, book by a good escort service like the aboves mentioned and you will avoid trouble 🙂
Will escort agencies cheat you to provide pre-op lady in Bangkok?
Actually, you’ll find that most escort agencies in Bangkok tend to be very honest with their descriptions. If you order a certain “girl”, they won’t try the bait and switch.
I know the owner of this company, and they are legit: http://ladyboysbangkok.com/
Thank for share your tips. However, sometime It is very difficult to make difference between a real woman. I live in Bangkok, and my Gf is a ladyboy. I remember last time, you meet good friend of her. I am 100% sure about she is a woman, but not. Hehe, I feel very stange. Even I check everything, also her voice…nothing from a man.
I make a quiz for anyone can try to recognize lady between Ladyboy: http://www.thailadyboylovers.com/ladyboys/
Thank man, i like your blog
Love Thai food. Girls and hospitality
In some places one cannot tell the guys from the girls
How to have a great time in Phuket?
This can help with that:
As I was the married man on our boys trip it was my job to play special lookout for lady boys. The hands is a great indicator as it seems a hard one to alter with early hormone therapy. The single best tip was watching their elbows. If they bend past 180° then they’re a woman. Men physically cannot do this and I dont believe there is an operation to fix it.
Never heard about the elbow thing before. I’ll keep an eye out for this.
Thanks for the tip!
My wife and I are traveling to Phuket soon, my wife always wanted to try sex with another woman, she Is to shy to attempt It at home.
Do you think This fantasy could happen with a bar girl or freelancer as you call them .
Or do Thai girls pray solely on men ?
Great question, I’ll answer this in detail on my next post which will go live within the next 48 hours.
I have heard that when in Thailand (Phuket) it is advisable to haggle prices with everyone for anything.
Is that true.? Thanks, Alf
Yes and no. You can haggle at most small and independently owned shops. And if you are into the “pay-for-play” scene, many girls will negotiate on their price.
But you can’t haggle at places like cinemas, grocery stores, brand name apparel, etc…
You can also ask to check the “girl’s” ID. Every Thai ID has the word Miss, Mrs. or Mr. depending on sex before the name of the person. A good pretext to do this is to flatter the “girl” and ask to check her age to make sure she is of age to go with you. If a girl is not carrying the Thai national ID (issued to every Thai citizen) or refuses to show it, then it is wise to excuse yourself and take a rain check until she can show ID. Note that these titles do NOT change even if the person has an operation which turns them into a female–so if you see a girl’s ID listing her as MR. then she is a MAN, plain and simple.
A man cannot straighten his arm beyond 180 degrees. A woman can!
Next time I’m harassed by ladyboys, I’ll put this to the test.
how to find nice female companion free of cost in phuket
Haha, that story was interesting. I had a same experience in Manila, Philippine, beautiful girl approached me, she was tall, silky hair, nice butt, etc. But i was not too late , that she can reach to my room. lol. If you are enough smart, listening to their voice is important.
The simplest thing is to only take girls from the Go-Go bars like those in Nana Plaza. There are ladyboy bars there too, but they will tell you up front that they are ladyboys. Sometimes they don’t say anything because they assume you already know. So if in doubt, ask.
More doubtful are the post-operation ladyboys, who, with some justification, consider themselves “real” women and may reply that way if asked.
Picking up freelancers of any sex is always a more risky proposition.
Can’t argue with that. Go-Gos is the easier method. But many guys, including myself, love hitting the clubs and seeing where the night takes you. Which is where this little guide can be vital.
As they say, “There are a million right ways to do one thing…”. And I guess whoring can fall into that category as well.
S/he will be looking every five minutes into any reflective surface to make sure s/he is still beautiful. My cousin is a kathoey so I know it only too well !
What a complete discriminatory article.
Rule #9 – Girls can hyper-extend their arms. Guys can’t.
This is by far the best and easiest check. Get them to straighten their arms. If they don’t hyperextend, they have a penis.
I’ve never heard that before. I’ve notice that some women’s arms sometimes hyper-extend, but no idea that statement could be considered an absolute. I’ll need to check into that.
What´s the panic?? I had my best BJ´s from Ladyboyz..and they not get pregnant 😉
LoL, I’m glad you were taken care of. Lady boys aren’t my thing, but plenty of others enjoy the “third sex” of Thailand.
Here’s a ladyboy’s story on how she dated foreigners. Maybe you can pick up a few ‘warning signs’ here before you date.
grab the cock and if your hand find something sticking out, then run like hell.
Yep, when I first came to Thailand I always did the “check” before leaving the club.
KoT, whats the “check” involve?
One rule system:
When in doubt. Don’t.
Applicable to other decisions with potentially soul destroying, permanently debilitating, ego destruction or just exposure to something you just can’t un-see no matter how much you want to forget. as outcomes.
Yep, can’t go wrong with the “One Rule System”
I would add an 8th rule to that list:
Rule # 8: Listen to the voice!
If s/he has a deep voice, it’s a pretty good indication.
Also, if s/he tends to keep his/her voice down, it might be because s/he is trying to hide that deep masculine tone.
S/he may look hot, that is, until s/he rowrs “Suck my cock!” in that low manly growl.
LoL, Great tip!