This is a night of partying with Thailand’s superstar, a movie actor, a birthday boy, a spoiled rich kid, and yours truly.
It all started with my good friend waking up in Koh Samui on his birthday. He looks around and decides he wants to do something special, he goes to the airport and buys a one way ticket to Bangkok.
I wake up that afternoon hearing that Birthday Boy is coming to town. A smile appears on my face as I know tonight is going to be a great night.
Hours later there are four of us sitting in my apartment having a few pre-party drinks. My friends are looking at the computer getting excited over some photos of a tennis player.
It’s around 10pm and still a little early to hit up the clubs, so Tran takes us to a local Gentleman’s Club with some very nice looking women. Although these places aren’t really my style, the girls look nice, are friendly, and a few speak English. Not a bad place to start.
I’m introduced to the Rich Kid. He’s tall, good looking, and has a cocky attitude.
(I still don’t understand how people who have accomplished nothing in their lives except spending daddy’s money can be so cocky.)
He shakes my hand weakly not even looking at me. I instantly take a disliking to him. However, he is connected and good friends with my friends. I put on a good face and try to give him the benefit of doubt.
(At this point in my life, I believed it was a good idea having wealthy friends even if they were dicks to anyone who was not up to their social status. I’ve since learned that this is complete B.S.)
The Gentleman’s Club is okay, but too low key. We leave after an hour to Funky…
The taxi drops us off and I see this beautiful Lamborghini parked in front of the club. Not in any kind of parking spot, just in the front of the club like he owns the place. I think to myself, “Great…”
We walk to the entrance and everyone pulls out their I.D.s for the doorman. I’m thinking, “how weird” and walk through till I hit a wall of Thai security asking for my I.D.
Never in 3 months of living in Bangkok have I ever had to show my I.D. In fact, I didn’t even carry one with me anymore. Tran talks to the security in Thai, but they wouldn’t budge.
(Later I found out that this is mainly a Thai club and coming in as a white guy was not an advantage.)
Shit. It’s my buddy’s birthday and we’ve got a good group ready to party and we are meeting up with some people I’ve never met. Looks like I’m going to have to sit this part of the evening out. I tell my friend sorry and that he should go in and party without me. Just before we go different ways, Tran says he’ll be right back.
I see him walk over to a table of 5 people, one of which is the Movie Star, our Thai actor friend. He talks with the Movie Star, and then another Thai guy surrounded by 3 girls. The unknown guy waves to the security, I’m instantly allowed in with an apology.
We sit at that table, order a bottle of Tequila, and introductions are made. The guy surrounded by the girls (later which will be referred to as “groupies”), was introduced as Paradorn. My friend whispers that he’s the Thai tennis player. I’ve never heard of him, but extended my hand. He took it with a firm grip and a looked me in the eye as he accepted my thanks for getting me in.
I instantly take a liking to him.
Not much of note happens at this point. We drink, chat, and relax. We have a large enough group that we are the party. I notice our table is getting quite a few of looks from the Thais, but this is standard whenever we go out with the Movie Star. He isn’t as popular as five years ago, but people do ask to have their photo taken with him whenever we go out.
The bottle of Tequila is gone, more drinks are ordered. We move inside to a private second bar. We hang out, dance with the groupies, and chat.
The details are a little off, but at this time I danced with one of the groupies that the Rich Kid was spending a lot of time with. During this time, I’m told that I apparently “looked” at the girl like she was a whore.
Okay….how else do you define groupies….
Birthday Boy, Roommate, and I stop dancing and do the rounds in the club. Five minutes later I’m in the center of the dance floor and realize that we are the only white guys around and not getting a friendly vibe from the Thais. I wonder if this is a Thai club that isn’t overly fond of foreigners…
As some of you may know, picking up women is quite easy. And when you are in Thailand, it becomes much easier. Meeting and sleeping with women is simply a numbers game.
In America, if you approach and talk with 7 different women, you will usually sleep with one of them. In Thailand this number is drastically reduced to 1 in 3.
Meaning, if there is nothing stacked against you, you will sleep with one out of three women that you talk to. Whether you go for the one night stand, or the delayed approach by getting a phone number, these statistics tend to always hold true.
Unless of course you are racially discriminated against or have an angry ex-girlfriend stalking you through the club threatening every girl you talk with.
I test this theory by approaching 3 different groups of girls…
And in record time, I manage to get shot down as quickly as you can say 1 2 3.
I look around and don’t see any ex girlfriends, so I decide this must be a Thai club which is not fond of foreigners.
It was still relatively early, around midnight, so I wasn’t concerned. I personally prefer to hang out with friends and not think about getting a girl till around 3am.
There was still more than enough time…
I work my way back to the bar where our group is at. I see Paradorn standing at the bar observing the group. I order us a drink and start talking with him. In one of my brilliant moments, I look at the girls and notice them dancing quite well. I look at Paradorn and say, “I’ve got to ask, which one is the best?”
He kind of gives me a double look, wondering if I’m joking, serious, or what. He then realizes that I have no idea who he is. He lifts up his ring, and says that he’s married.
For some reason I was in complete shock, a Thai superstar being married in Thailand is such a waste. We chat for a couple more minutes and move on. I’m left with thoughts of:
(I later learned that he is one of Thailand’s most famous people outside of royalty. He also married Miss Universe 2005 and is very well off financially.)
He moves up on my list from being a cool guy to being my role model.
The club is closing at 2:30am. Everyone is drunk and outside. Thais leaving the dance floor realized that Paradorn and the Movie Star are there. Everyone is gathered around taking our photos. My friends and I are asked if we are also actors. Movie Star says:
“You don’t know these guys? They’re Sweden’s biggest actors.”
As everyone is taking our pictures I think to myself, “Apparently tonight I’m Swedish.”
After 15 minutes of having my picture taken by random people, I look around and see that Roommate is gone. I ask around and hear he went to 7-11 for a minute to buy a phone card.
I ask the Birthday Boy where everyone going to after, he said we’re all going to get something to eat. We walk to the cars. Paradorn goes into the Lamborghini with a groupie (should have figured), and we went to Rich Boy’s car.
As we get to Rich Boy’s car, he turns around, looks at me with a cocky smile and says:
I look around and see him, Birthday Boy, and two groupies. I look at my buddy. He isn’t quite sure what to do, he’s a good friend but the groupies are pretty freaking hot. I’m instantly pissed that Rich Boy waited till we are at the car and says this to embarrass me in front of everyone, but such is life.
I tell my friend to go ahead and we’ll meet up later. They drive off.
I’m alone in the parking lot pissed off and drunk. I then realized that Roommate should be around. I head back to the club trying to balance my mental state which is pissed and totally drunk. There are still quite a few people around but no white guy. I grab my phone and call Roommate, I can barely make out his words. I asked him where he was, and he says he’ll be back in 2 minutes.
Five minutes go by, 10 minutes, then 15 minutes. This is getting ridiculous. I call him again and he says that he can see me. I look over and see a white guy stumbling towards me. I remember thinking, “Wow, he is completely trashed.”
He tells me he got lost. I look past him and can clearly see the 7-11 on the corner of the street. I look back at him as he is swaying from side to side with a smile on his face.
Meanwhile, I see two very cute girls and introduce myself. I ask the standard questions like name, age, what brings you to Bangkok, etc….
They are college girls attending ABEC University. Instantly I think, threesome with two college girls, sweet. I look them over again, one is a 7 and the other is a 6.5.
I invite them to go to an after party club. After a bit of sweet talking, we are all in the taxi. Roommate is in front, I’m sitting in the back middle seat surrounded by college girls.
In the back seat I start to lay the ground work for “Operation Threesome” with a little touching and kissing. I kiss the girl on my left, then the one on the right. As I’m kissing one of them, my hand is working its way down the other one.
I try to get them to kiss each other, but no go. Which in a sober state would have raised a red flag, but in my current drunken state I dismissed it by thinking more drinks were needed.
We arrive at the club, one of the girls is on the phone. I take the hand of the 7 and lead her out of sight from her friend. The fun starts. Five minutes later she is on her knees.
Her friend suddenly appears and is not too happy.
I try to salvage Operation Threesome…it doesn’t work. I hail them a taxi and enter the club to find Roommate at the pool tables. I swear, leave that guy alone for 5 minutes and he’s always hustling money off some tourists.
Meanwhile, Birthday Boy is getting food with the Superstar, the Rich Kid, and the groupies. They decided to go home, Birthday Boy is not invited. He calls telling me he’s on the way to meet up with us.
By my count, I have about 15 minutes to get him a present. So I start Operation Threesome Part 2, but this time for him. I completely underestimate how drunk I am, my silver tongue vanishes and turns into coal. He arrives and I am still empty handed. Instead we settle on a bottle of Vodka.
Then I see her, a very cute Asian with a beautiful smile, great ass, and okay tits…a solid 8. Our eyes meet, she looks away, and I get hungry. She’s not Thai, which is even better.
I approach and we chat. She’s even cuter close up…an 8.5. I take her hand and lead her to our table. I introduce her to the Birthday Boy and make my exit.
I don’t see them for the rest of the night.
Everything else is a blur of playing pool, drinking, and women.
Although, the next morning, Birthday Boy informed me that Japanese girls are amazing in bed!
Posted on Gods of Thailand March 7, 2011 in Stories of Seven